"Because I Have Been Given Much": Giving Aide and Succor Where It Is Needed

Tonight, after a race to the gas station, I pulled up to the pump and was approached by a young woman. "Do you have a few dollars you could spare for gas? I need to make it home to Santaquin. It has been a really long day."

I never carry cash and my trepidation, initially, in giving her money is that I don't have a lot of money. I could have told her no, saying that I just don't have the money, but, truth be told, I have the money; I don't have a lot of money, but I have a little. And then the lyrics to the hymn, "Because I Have Been Given Much," ran through my mind. The first verse starts: "Because I have been given much, I too must give." 

Considering the hymn, I responded to her, "I just have my card, so I would just have to go and get some money out for you."

"Would that be okay?" she asked, appearing to be tired and suffering from the aforementioned long day.

"No," I said. "It's no problem at all."

I finished pumping my own gas and asked the gas station attendant to put ten dollars on the pump she was on. He looked a little confused and told me someone else had already put five dollars on. On hearing this, I asked him to change the amount to five dollars, but then I changed my mind. What would an extra five dollars hurt to give her?

She finished pumping the gas as I walked out and thanked me. I told her she was welcome and proceeded to get into my car. I drove home and continued to hum the hymn to myself.

In this time of recession and joblessness, it falls on each and every one of us to lift each other up and give aide and succor where we can. I often find myself wondering what the beggar on the street needs money for and if they are going to use it to buy drugs or beer. However, I realized, especially tonight, it is not for me to decide what they are going to use the money for. What they use the money for is totally on them. What is on me is whether or not, seeing a stranger in need, I give aide and succor to them or deny them the help they say need.

I may not always be able to help a stranger, but I have decided that I will help where I can. I will give aide when I am able, regardless of what they choose to do with that help. Another line from the hymn springs to mind. It goes, "I cannot see another's lack and I not share." 

When we see someone suffering and have the means to help, should we not help? We are all under the same blue skies and we all, at some point in our lives, suffer. We are all connected. Give aide and succor where you can and raise up the poor in spirit to levels of dignity and peace.

Namaste.

Equality Was Forced to the Back of The Bus in Utah Again

There was a point last month that I finally felt like a human being. I felt like I was equal to all the other people in this beautiful country. Same-sex couples were finally allowed to marry and I was finally proud to be a Utahn. However, with the stay of same-sex marriage and Gov. Herbert's letter saying that the marriages that occurred when it was legal will not be recognized by the state, I am no longer a proud Utahn. I, once again, am a second-class citizen.

There is something that gets spouted off by bigots across Utah and across the nation. They say, "I have nothing wrong with you as a person. I love you and I think that you are a good person, but I don't believe what you are doing is right. I don't think your lifestyle is right. I don't think that you should be allowed to marry because marriage is between a man and a woman. We can't change the definition of marriage because it isn't right for two men to marry or two women to marry. What's next? Are we going to let a man marry his dog? But I do want you to be happy and I am very tolerant of you and others like you."

Statements like these, may seem like very supportive and tolerant statements to the people that make them, but they are simply backhanded slaps to the face and punches to the gut. Saying you support someone and want them to be happy and then taking away rights given to them through the law is a two-faced response. You cannot love someone and say you support them, and then advocate for their rights to be taken away from them because you don't "believe" in them.

Also,saying we cannot redefine marriage is erroneous because marriage has been redefined over and over. Men were able to have multiple wives. Men were able to marry and have concubines that they loved more than they loved their own wives. As part of the covenant of marriage, men were able to beat their wives and legally rape their wives. Women were property under marriage vows and not equals. People were only allowed to marry within their same race. When Mormons were practicing polygamy and it became illegal, they were forced out of the country into hiding to continue to practice their beliefs. All of the things that made up marriage and the legal rights of men have changed time and time again. Definitions change and times change.

I don't care if you don't allow same-sex marriage in the temples, synagogues, and chapels. That is your religious right to deny, but to not allow the legal marriage of two adults that love each other is unconstitutional and cruelly unequal. By allowing same-sex marriage, although you blanket your right to keep same-sex marriage from happening under the guise of your religious right, the state is not infringing on your religious rights. However, by not allowing it, you are infringing on my constitutional rights and the rights of all the other tax paying LGBTQ Americans and Utahns.

I can only hope that one day I will be proud to be a Utahn again. I can only hope I can feel like an equal and not a second-class citizen. For now, the words of a poem by Emily Dickinson come to me every moment of the day. She writes, "I'm Nobody! Who are you?/Are you--Nobody--Too?..." I can only hope and be patient that equality is on the horizon and my sense of being a "Nobody" will become a nightmarish past.

Namaste!

Beginning the New Year Off Right

2013 ended with the flu, but it began with me on the mend. Today, was the first day of this whole week I was able to go to the gym. Though it was interspersed with coughing fits, I was able to go for an hour and a half and I feel like a new man again. I will have to take it slowly for a bit, but being able to get my heart rate up again and work my muscles feels so good.

On day two of the new year, I am starting it out with a bang. I haven't suffered from a deep bought of depression for almost a year and I see life as a journey worth taking on. So with a goal for the New Year of continuing on this journey of self-betterment, I am starting the new year off with a healthier outlook than last year began with. I have gone from the darkest hours of life at the beginning of the last new year to brighter today's of the newest and best year yet. I know that struggles will be had and are waiting for me. I am not negating the inevitability of hardship and struggle, but I know I have been through some dark days and I can come out of any possible future ones with a smile on my face and sweat on my brow.

I hope that we all have a great year. I know mine is starting out well and I know that with each new moment comes a challenge and promise of something more. I will take on the New Year with my head held high. I hope each and everyone is able to reach their highest peaks and then reach higher.

Namaste.